There was a story that was recently published in The Daily Dot that talked of a woman who was invited to a wedding that was completely sabotaged by the groom’s mother. The groom apparently decided to have his wedding in the park, as opposed to having it in a traditional church setting.
This, needless to say, did not sit well with his mother. To show her disdain for his personal choice, the mother went behind the groom’s back and sent new invitations to all of his guests to inform them that the wedding was a very casual event that required only ‘picnic’ type of attire.
When the wedding finally happened, the bride saw her guests in their Sunday best, while the guests of the groom were all wearing hoodies and shorts. The big question is this: why do some mothers treat their sons as if they are married to them?
The story about the mother from hell was not a new one. There are many stories out there that are shared about family problems (mostly about mothers who can’t let go of their sons) when it comes to weddings. In this case, we have a mother that acts as if her son’s decision to have his wedding done his way was somehow a finger flip at her. There is an old belief that girls are all “daddy’s girls” and boys are all “momma’s boys” that has been spoken of since the dawn of time.
Typically, boys often feel compelled to protect their mothers and serve as the “man” of the house if, and when, their actual fathers are not at home. We can forgive children who take on these unrealistic roles when it comes to their parents. The thing that simply can’t hold weight here is that you have parents who begin to believe the nonsense and then treat their children accordingly.
When a boy grows up to become a man, some mothers can’t let go of their need to feel loved and treated as if she is his number one—especially if he gets married. Some moms treat their sons as if they are competing with their new wives, which is madness considering the fact that the relationship that a man has with his mother should always have its boundaries that fall outside of the relationship he has with his wife.
When a mother can’t let go of her son, she loses touch with reality and fails to see that she is harming him more than she is proving her love. By hanging on for dear life to her son, she stifles his ability to grow in a healthy relationship with a woman that will be his life partner. The mother’s selfish tendencies ultimately create a barrier between her and her son because she has now caused conflict in other phases of his life.
If a mother wants to prove her love to her son, the worst thing she could do would be to attempt to run his life. Every mother must learn that there will come a time when she needs to let go and allow her relationship with her son to progress naturally onto a new chapter. By fighting her need to be the catalyst in her son’s life, a mother will show her true love in ways she can’t imagine. Additionally, her son will benefit from their healthy relationship by being the man he needs to be for his future children.